'I Never Took My Career Seriously'

'I didn't like doing jhatak-mataks.'
'I would subconsciously start feeling, 'Oh my God, my makeup man and my driver will be watching this.''

Moushumi Chatterjee recently suffered a stroke and underwent hospitalisation for a pacemaker.

She is also trying to come to terms with her beloved daughter's untimely death in 2019.

But Moushumi's famous never-say-die spirit stays intact.

Her new Bengali film Aarii is timed with her 73rd birthday on April 26, and Moushumi tells Dinesh Raheja, "You have to be a little mischievous. Life will be very dull if there is no spice, so I  add dalchini and laung to bring flavour." 

Was Aarii's release date deliberately planned?

The filmmakers knew about my birthday because once upon a time, I was very famous (laughs), and those who like me, remember me.

You return to acting after almost a decade. How was the experience?

During this shoot, I was continuously getting admitted in hospitals.

I suffered a mild stroke.

Then I had to get a pacemaker inserted.

My lungs were badly affected.

I have been neglecting my health.

After my elder daughter Payal passed away, my husband Babu was admitted to the ICU twice.

I was praying to God that I should be able to somehow complete the movie.

You have a long way to go still. You look fit as a fiddle in the trailer.

But I was so ill!

We were shooting at an isolated place near Digha and I was attended to by a government doctor.

They were debating whether to hospitalise me.

I relaxed in the room for the whole day and shot at night because it was a very important sequence between my screen son and me and I did not want to cancel.

The film's teaser indicates you have a challenging role of a mother with dementia.

It is one of the best roles of my career.

It was a challenge but in my own life of people, I have known people who keep forgetting.

Also, at the time of the narration, it struck me that the behaviour pattern of my character is identical to my own.

I am full of apnapan and wish to make others comfortable but I am also very child-like, a little mad, and can say any good-bad-ugly in front of everybody, without thinking what the other person will feel.

Yes, you are definitely outspoken. Your comment on Jaya Bachchan, where you said you were better than her, recently went viral.

I was compared and I don't like being compared.

I think there is a very healthy competition.

I don't want to go into details because if I do so, that will be very bad for the other actors.

Today, you come across as a confident woman with a mind of her own. But you started off as a young actress who did as she was told. What has brought about this change?

I always had a mind of my own but it takes time to realise that.

When you enjoy your life -- when you develop the ability to be alone and yet not feel lonely -- you get the confidence to speak your mind.

In Aarii, you play mother to a son. Do you miss having a son or is gender immaterial?

I do have a son. My elder sister's son Shubhadeep is my daughter Meghaa's age.

Aap usse beta maante hain?

Maanti nahin, jaanti hoon! But I would like to add that I don't miss anything because I am a very detached person.

I didn't know about that aspect of your personality.

I am also a fun person.

In Aarii, there is a dialogue where my son tells me, 'Sometimes I cannot tolerate you.'

And my response is: 'How dare you say that! I myself cannot tolerate myself for too long.'

You have to be a little mischievous.

Life will be very dull if there is no spice, so I add dalchini and laung to bring flavour. 

I may be child-like but I am not childish.

I feel if you have something in your heart, either tell that person or forget it. Sarcastic people don't have guts. 

People clean their outsides with soap and water but inside, there is so much malice.

When you look back on your successful career, do you feel you got your due recognition as an actress?

I never worked hard.

I was never ambitious and never took my career seriously... because I could not.

I had so many responsibilities.

I entered Hindi films as a married woman and within two years, I delivered my elder daughter, Payal.

Your comic flair is underappreciated. Like in the 1978 hit Swarag Narak in which your role had comic, dramatic and even grey shades.

It was a good boost for my career but would been even better had I been serious.

As one senior Bengali actress told me, 'You are very good looking and talented but not in the good books of filmmakers and heroes.'

You followed it with a comic goldmine in Angoor (1982).

Haribhai (Sanjeev Kumar) said, 'You are the only actress who can play this role.'

These compliments are my awards so I never sought to buy an award.

But one area was your Achilles' heel: Dancing.

(Laughs) I never took dancing seriously.

Whenever I was called for rehearsals, I was never available.

I didn't like doing jhatak-mataks.

I would subconsciously start feeling, 'Oh my God, my makeup man and my driver will be watching this.'

Did you lose roles because of this?

I lost many good roles. I lost Koshish even after shooting for three days.

The moment somebody told me you have to compromise, I would say: To hell with it.

I left Desh Premee after shooting for two days.

When I was narrated the story of NN Sippy's Ghar, there were many bedroom sequences.

I feel that if a skirt is lifted above the knee, it doesn't look as vulgar as a raised sari.

I told Vinod Mehra I won't be able to do the scenes also because there was so much gossip about us.

Shashi Kapoor pointed out that Vinod had never clarified the gossip about me, even though I was his best friend's wife.

So I said I will not do the film.

What would you say was your screen image?

My impression was that of a lady you can take home.

The shooting of Raj Khosla's Daasi was stalled because Rekha wanted my role of the wife, and suggested that I should play the dancer Tarabai.

Raj Khosla said, 'From which angle does Moushumi look like Tarabai?'

When Dharamji came to my house to sign me for Ghayal, he said they wanted somebody innocent, and no other heroine had that look.

Does your daughter Meghaa provide you with emotional support now?

Not really. My husband Babu has become totally dependant on Meghaa after Payal's demise.

But I feel Meghaa has become weak after Payal.

Payal's marriage was a disaster so Meghaa doesn't want to think on those lines.

Meghaa says she would rather care of her parents than somebody else.

She is a lovely daughter.

See, when I had a stroke, I should have gone at that time... but I came back.

Payal chali gayi phir bhi main yahan hoon, there has to be some reason for that.

I still have so many duties.

I have a blind brother.

Meghaa has become emotionally dependent on me.

I find my family is energetic if I am around.

Has the grief of losing your daughter Payal resulted in a better philosophical understanding of life?

I never thought it would happen in my life but it did.

I saw my child on a funeral pyre in front of my eyes.

When Payal was in hospital, I would pray at night. It was a very traumatic time.

But you have to live your life till your death. And when you are living, it's better to live it in a better way rather than in a bitter way.